Tuesday, August 28, 2007

a few more reasons why I love the boys in my house, even though when it comes to peeing, they can't aim for shit

The other night, at dinner time, I noticed Levi wasn't really touching his mac and cheese.

"Levi," I said. " You have to eat."

"So I can grow?"

"Yes, so you can grow." (And also so you can not tell me you're hungry just as I'm turning out the lights, and also so you can not be a hypoglycemic nightmare until then, but to a four-year-old, the need to grow is a valid enough argument for eating so I'll just leave it at that.)

Levi dug in. A few minutes after finishing, he and I were lying next to each other on the couch.

"Mommy," he said. " Am I five now?"


I was sitting on the back steps meticulously digging through our dog Harriet's coat with a comb--yes, a fine-toothed comb!--simultaneously intrigued and repulsed by the amount of dandruff I was stirring up, when Stupid Daddy pulled into the driveway.

"Having fun?" he asked.

"Oh my god, you wouldn't believe it," I said, without looking up. "Look at how disgusting this is!"

He glanced in my direction and kept going, right on into the house.

"You can't appreciate it because you can't see well enough," I called after him. "I wish you were wearing your reading glasses."

"I wish I shared your reality," he said, and shut the door behind him.


I was driving Levi and Ezra home from school and they were engaged in an animated discussion about how quickly they could get from point A to point B if they had wings.

"Levi," Ezra said. "If you had wings you'd be home before your eyes."

Silence for a couple of beats.

"Actually," he said, "before you know it."

1 comment:

Stacy said...

I love your little slices o'life. They're always good for a smile. I especially like the ones where you and StupidDaddy are trying to have sex, or talking about having sex, or discussing genitalia with your kids. I can so relate to your world.