Friday, May 11, 2007

why?

This blog is not called stupidmommy because I have low self-esteem. On the contrary! I love myself so much that I can not only take an insult, I can flaunt it. I can turn a sow's ear into a silk purse; I have just that much self-confidence and inner strength. Really!

Last year, my boys went through a sort of nasty period during which they were quite fond of calling me "Stupid Mommy." I would tell Ezra it was time to go to bed and he'd say, "Stupid Mommy! I don't want to go to bed." Levi would trip and fall on the walkway and cry out, "Stupid Mommy! I tripped!" (Actually, he would say, "I did trip"--that was always the way he indicated past tense.) No matter what went wrong, Stupid Mommy was somehow to blame. The downside of being omnipotent is that everything's your fault.

Needless to say, it was totally annoying, and my husband and I employed all sorts of savvy-parent techniques to stop them from saying it. I wish I could tell you that one of them worked. But the truth is, the boys simply wore themselves out with it and have since moved on to other obnoxious habits. Now they don't ever call me Stupid Mommy.

Strangely, though, the name grew on me. It morphed into a kind of endearment. My husband, every so often, began to say things like, "Hey, Stupid Mommy, would you do me a favor and grab me a diaper for Lilah?" How could I not just melt hearing those words? Privately, all these months, I've actually been calling myself Stupid Mommy. In a loving way. And now you can call me Stupid Mommy too.

So, that explains the name for the blog. But what explains the blog? I don't know exactly. Possible reasons:
  1. I like the sound of one hand clapping.
  2. I like to write.
  3. I like to do things that were sort of interesting and revolutionary five years earlier.
  4. I'm a narcissist. (But I'm working on that!)
  5. Not to get all 4-ish on the enneagram or anything, but there's a part of me that wants to make things--you know, create--and with three kids, the oldest of whom is five, this is the best I can manage.
  6. I'm turning 40 next year. Enough said about that.
  7. Possible fame and fortune.
  8. It's 3:41am and I know I just won't be able to fall asleep until I do this, finally, after contemplating it for a long, long time.

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