big bummer

Ezra has greeted me every morning for the last couple of weeks with fangs bared and steam coming out of his ears. Among the many explanations for his hostility that Stupid Daddy and I have tossed around for sport is the possibility that it has something to do with having to take a pill, and, specifically, my insistence that he take the pill right this second, so he can't ease into the morning on his own terms.

Last night the five of us were all hanging out and reading books before bed, and I asked Ezra point blank why it is that he gets so angry when I say, "Good morning." He said that he likes to be by himself when he wakes up.

"But I have to get this pill in you right away so you can eat when you get hungry," I said. And then--you could smell the synapses firing away--Stupid Daddy made the brilliant suggestion that we bring the pill into the boys' room at night with a cup of water and he could be in charge of taking it when he woke up.

Ezra's eyes lit up. My eyes lit up. Stupid Daddy's eyes would have lit up except they were closed at that point. We agreed on it.

This morning, as I was taking care of the other two downstairs, I heard Ezra banging around upstairs. I left him to come down on his own time. When he did appear, about twenty minutes later, he smiled and gave me a big hug.

"Did you take your pill?" I asked--hoping he had not just so I would know it was taken care of but also so that he would have the opportunity to be successful.

He nodded and smiled again. And we proceeded to have the best day we've had in recent memory.

Tonight, I set up the pill and cup by the window sill and reminded Ezra about the morning routine.

Except! As I was tucking the boys into bed, Levi asked, "What's that?" and pointed to something on the carpet. It was the goddamn pill from this morning.

"I spit it out because I didn't want to take it," Ezra said.

And on so many levels, that totally fucking sucks.